How do you know if he or she is the right one for you? Check out these 10 signs

Photo from: Unsplash
Whether you and your partner have been together for three or ten years, it is very normal to ask yourself this question, "Is this one the right person for me?"
Take note that asking this kind of question does not necessarily mean that you doubt the person you are in love with. It is because there is no green flag waving above your partner's head and it takes time to know him or her.
A licensed psychotherapist Annie Wright, LMFT said to Bustle, "asking yourself such a question does not mean you're relationship is bound to be broken. "Contrary to what [movies] and most pop songs teach us," she said.
"Love and being with the 'right' partner doesn't always look like fireworks or being completely certain about the other," Wright added.
Here is the guide to help you determine if you are with the right person, according to PsychCentral and Bustle:
1. You feel contented with each other
Both partners should feel satisfied with each other. On the days you or your partner are feeling down, you should boost them up.
You know if you are with the right person when he or she is there for you to support you. Also, having them in your life brings so much joy to your life.
2. You feel easy being with them
"If you have a sense of ease in being with this person – you're not often on edge, hyper-vigilant, waiting for a fight, or feeling neglected – that is a good sign," said Virginia Williamson, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist.
Take note that this sign does not indicate that you will never have occasional arguments or issues with your partner. But in overall vibes, you feel steady and relaxed being with them.
3. You both handle arguments healthily
Arguments or conflicts are normal and unavoidable in relationships. But the way you and your partner handle conflict can be an important indicator if he or she is the right person for you.
Both of you should handle issues with respect for each other.
4. You can be real to yourself in the relationship
You have the freedom to express what's on your mind, and how you feel, and bring up tough issues without being judged or loved any less.
Barbara Santini, MSCI, psychologist and sex and relationship adviser said, "Bending to impress a person or your partner is never a brilliant idea. Showing your true colors from the beginning is a fundamental aspect of a happy and healthy relationship."
5. There is no abuse or any kind of manipulation in the relationship
Abuse such as emotional, psychological, sexual, or physical should not be tolerated in any type of relationship no matter how much you love someone.
You know that the relationship you have right now is healthy if there is no abuse or manipulation. So never ignore any red flags in a relationship, leave right away, if respect and love are no longer being served.
Always remember the right person will not do any harm to you.
6. You both respect each other
Ask yourself these questions, "Do I feel safe? Do I feel respected?"
Salina Schmidgall, M.Ed., PLPC, NCC, a mental health therapist said, "If you don't feel either of these, you aren't with the right person."
Forms of disrespect could be yelling, crossing boundaries, name-calling, lying – the list goes on and on.
7. You are both okay on spending time apart
"Having hobbies and social gatherings without our partner lets us gain self-worth outside of our relationship, which is healthy for everyone involved," said Emily Griffin, MA, LCPC, LPC, a mental health therapist.
Since you have respect for each other, taking time away from each other regularly is no big deal.
8. You both actively listen to each other
You know if you are with the right partner when they pay attention to every detail you say.
"Do they let you take the lead and not turn every conversation back onto them? Do they remember things you have told them in the past?" said Pippa Murphy, a sex and relationship expert.
By asking these questions, you can determine if your partner actually listens and cares about your sentiments.
9. You learn from each other
Chloe Ballatore, relationship and communication expert said that if both persons in a relationship actively listen to each other, they can both learn new opinions, new approaches, and new outlooks in life. As a result, it can help you to be a better-rounded version of yourself.
10.You are both committed to the relationship
"The period of initial animalistic chemistry will fade and your relationship will evolve," said Relationship expert Sandra Myers.
Myers added that if your partner is still committed to your relationship as they were in the beginning, then you know you're with the right one.
Remember that there is no exact or definite answer in determining the right person for you. To know them very well, writing the pros and cons lists, and doing other types of journaling might help you gain clarity. (Kleir Raymundo)

Last Modified: 2024-Jul-10 21.02 +0800