How to Spot Red Flags in a Friendship
2025-Apr-05 08:00
Photo courtesy: Pexels
Friendships should bring support and joy, but not all are healthy. Sometimes, toxic traits are subtle, and spotting red flags early can help prevent emotional strain. According to Hope Kelaher, author of Here to Make Friends: How to Make Friends as an Adult, "As a society, we often don't acknowledge unhealthy friendships in the same way that we do romances and family dynamics."
So, here are a few things you must know to recognize red flags:
1. They speak badly about other people while they're with you
Constantly hearing your friend speak negatively about others can be a red flag. It might reflect deeper issues like insecurity, a craving for validation, or a lack of empathy. This behavior could indicate an unhealthy dynamic, where trust is lacking and toxicity begins to take root in the friendship.
2. They focus only on themselves and never show interest in your life
When a friend is always talking about themselves and never cares to ask how you are doing, it might indicate a lack of genuine interest in your existence. It might also indicate issues with social behavior or even narcissism, making the friendship feel one-sided and unfulfilling.
3. You don't feel comfortable being yourself around them
When you notice that you can't be yourself with some friends, it may be because of social anxiety, fear of judgment, or no real connection. This discomfort could be a sign that it's time to re-evaluate the friendship.
4. You feel like you have to keep the friendship going, even if you don't want to
Feeling guilty about maintaining a friendship usually stems from a need to avoid conflict, guilt, or the perception that friendships are forever, even when they no longer provide satisfaction.
5. You feel drained emotionally after being around them
If you feel exhausted after hanging out with a friend, it may be because of a lack of emotional balance, persistent negativity, or clashing personalities, all of which will tire and unsettle you.
6. They disrespect or ignore your boundaries
When your friends consistently ignore your boundaries, it can weaken trust, create emotional strain, and damage the friendship. Respecting boundaries is essential for keeping a friendship healthy and supportive.
Friendships should bring support, happiness, and a sense of belonging. But that is not always the case, and some friendships can drain you or leave you feeling unappreciated. It's important to recognize when a friendship no longer uplifts you and take steps to prioritize your emotional well-being.
Have you ever experienced a friendship like this? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page!