7 steps to overcome insecurity

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Our insecurities reflect our doubts about ourselves due to negative thoughts. It can come from our attachment style, personality disorder, or lack of emotional support.
Insecurities can affect how we trust others, have healthy relationships, be confident in our abilities, and reach our goals, according to the American Psychological Association (APA).
Here are some of the possible causes of insecurities, according to Verywell Mind:
  • Childhood trauma
  • Unhealthy relationships
  • Setbacks
  • External focus
  • Social and cultural factors
To overcome your insecurities and work better to achieve your goals, here are the things that you should follow, based on BetterUp and Healthline:

1. Confront your feelings or thoughts

Whether you like it or not, you must face whatever negative feelings or thoughts you have to unpack what is going through your head. Learn to forgive yourself for things you failed to achieve.
Writing down or journaling may also help release the stress you can experience daily. This will also help you reflect on what you can learn from your negative experiences.

2. Practice self-care

Don't forget to prioritize your needs. Practicing self-care will help you to counter negative thoughts and build your self-worth.
You can practice self-care by:
  • have a massage
  • exercise for at least 30 minutes a day
  • take a social media detox
  • eat healthy meals
  • talk nicely to yourself

3. Set a realistic goal

You can always set goals to avoid feeling frustrated when you fail to reach them.
Allow yourself to achieve realistic and time-bound objectives and then create an action plan as a guide while working towards it.

4. Focus on your positive attributes

Always celebrate your success, either small or big. Being proud of what you do can help to strengthen your self-esteem.
Some of the ways to help boost your confidence are the following:
  • Write and save compliments you get from people
  • Write out all of your accomplished goals and reread them every time you feel insecure
  • Allot a few minutes every day to list some of the things you appreciate about yourself
  • Remind yourself that you don't need to excel always

5. Spend time with encouraging people

Stay close with people who see your talent and enjoy cheering on you. Being surrounded by supportive people can help you build confidence.You may try to set a coffee date with your friends or colleagues who uplift you. Being with them will help you appreciate your unique attributes and get new perspectives.

6. Stay away from people who fuel your insecurities

Protect your mental health at all costs. You can do it by setting personal boundaries with people pushing your insecurities.
Always be aware of the red flags you can observe with a family member, friend, or workmate because these people can cause you more stress and feel unmotivated.

7. Don't compare yourself to others

You will never be happy if you keep on comparing yourself to others. Always remember that people work at different timelines, and your path differs from theirs.
Learn to celebrate your wins without comparing them with other's accomplishments. Be your supporter and not your basher.


Boosting your self-esteem and overcoming your insecurities does not happen overnight, so try to be kind to yourself. This process will not be easy and frustrating, but take your time and don't be discouraged.
Small baby steps will eventually become bigger steps if keep on moving forward.

Last Modified: 2024-Apr-19 15.35.41 UTC+0800